Divorce ranks high on the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, second only to death. The effects can show up in a variety of ways from weight fluctuation, to insomnia, to feelings of insecurity about the future. This major life change takes a toll both emotionally and physically. That is why it’s so important to make sure that of all the things that need tending to at this difficult time—your home, your job, your children, the dog—the most important right now to tend to is YOU. Yes, YOU! Your self-care is easy to dismiss when you’re trying to hold it all together and stay sane. And yet, it’s imperative that you carve out time for a bit of self-care if you are to get through to the other side in the best shape possible.
Why it’s important
You know on the airplane when they outline the emergency instructions? The oxygen mask drops from the overhead compartment, and what do you do? Push it away and run down the aisle to help a fellow passenger? Of course not. You put on your own mask first, and then you’ll be in a position to help others. This is especially true of parents who are travelling with small children. Self care is not selfish. It’s about being the best you can be in order to meet the challenges ahead.
But what do I do?
You may be feeling overwhelmed right now, but that’s okay, it’s normal. Know that you’ve got this, you can do it.
The obvious things to start with are, of course, getting enough sleep, eating healthily, and getting some exercise every day. Even a 30 minute walk in the morning or evening can do wonders, not only for your silhouette, but your mind and spirit.
A good night’s sleep will keep you going on those long days that seem to stretch out forever. A power nap in the afternoon, if your schedule permits, will help you recharge for the evening shift.
Time to grieve
This may run counter to the ideal of modern day stoicism, but in actuality, penciling in a regular time to just sit with your feelings and allow yourself to feel sad or sorrowful really does work. Sometimes you can’t just give in to tears (say, in the middle of a board meeting) but knowing that later that day you’ll have the space you need to grieve, can help immensely. It doesn’t have to take long, just 10-20 minutes will do fine.
Getting “in touch” with the good life
Who doesn’t like a little pampering? Knowing that you have a feel-good treat such a massage or a pedicure at the end of a the week can keep you going the distance. This applies to the men too. But if those aren’t your thing, how about stopping at the local barbershop once in a while for a hot-towel shave?
The choices of small ways to treat yourself and feel human again are endless, and each person gets to decide what works best for them. Whatever the choice, the important thing is just to make sure it happens.
And please, remember to be compassionate with yourself. Divorce, or any type of Family Law Litigation, is a process which takes you on an emotional journey, the process back to the light takes time, patience, and kindness.
Support at this time is also very important, not only from family and friends, but also from a dedicated legal team. Bliss Law Group stands ready to take that journey with you, providing the resources and experience you need to achieve a fulfilling and rewarding future. Please contact us today to make an appointment.